What's this feeling of inadequacy in me? What happened to me? I used to be carefree but now, it seems like I have a lot of things to worry about. In fact, I should be pulling that pile of heavy rock. I deserve that. Even with that said, it still wouldn't made up the times I've wasted in the past. What will I become? When will I realise that this is the stepping stone to a bigger part of my life and work towards my goal? Even so, if anyone asked me if I've ever regretted the times I spent doing what I did in the past-truthfully, I did not. If I was given another chance, I think I would still spend it recklessly as well. However, things never happen the same way twice. Whatever happened has become history and there's no one with the ability to change it. But seriously, right now why am I dwelling in the past? You, all of you keep praising the cheerful and bubbly me. Throwing praises that I never get mad and how envious you are towards my carefree self. But with every praise, do you know that the other half of me die a little inside? Why AM I not like any of you? Why can't I have one person to go to when I need a laugh? Why must I always be the one cheering others up and there's no one there to cheer me up or make me laugh? Has this world no one to gift to me? Just one person, funnier than me would've made me more than satisfied. Whoever's reading this, never give up cheering others up when they're sad. It is an enjoyable task but sometimes, you gotta find someone like yourself out there. Just so you know people are there for you like you are for them.